Really, really more than you want to know.

The stuff nightmares are made of: @ocrd had a long night.

My night: 2yo son wants to sleep with big sister(4). 9pm: both asleep. 4am: Son wakes up, removes PJs and diaper, pees on big sister. ARGHH

Posted: October 29th, 2009 | No Comments »

My hair always looks best the day after a haircut. I wonder if @joycradio would agree.

my pubes are a nice length today. =]]

Posted: October 28th, 2009 | No Comments »

You think your bowel is irritable? @christiechong takes it to a whole new level.

bowel still too active like volcano, help!!!!

Posted: October 27th, 2009 | No Comments »

Which one of these husbands is not like the other?


Our anonymous submitter points out: “She still calls him ‘mine’ ???”

Posted: October 26th, 2009 | No Comments »

Sounds like @sakshijuneja is paying the price for a night of excess.

Side effects of over eating. Last nights Pedas, Fried Paneer, Cheese dips, Pasta, Pudding...all coming out now in full force.

Wait! Is she tweeting from the toilet? And if so, what is the preferred term for that?

Posted: October 23rd, 2009 | 1 Comment »

Attention, Internet: This will be your only warning. Watch out for @DLNelson.

Wow, am I PMSing.

You may want to put a recurring event on your calendars.

Posted: October 21st, 2009 | No Comments »

Craig is embarking on a deforestation project. But being economical about it.

I purchased a hair trimmer today, not for my hair of course, but for the frightening forest of pubes i seem to have acquired.

Craig’s ex-coworker submitted this one. Thanks, ex! And of course it’s not for craig’s hair!

Posted: October 19th, 2009 | No Comments »

Back before smartphones and Twitter, we used to just smoke a cigarette.

Omg i just had the best sex ever in my life so far

Thanks for the broadcast, @ladywolfdracula. We also love how you qualify this statement with “…so far.” It’s always good to leave room for improvement, especially if your sex partner follows your Twitter stream. We wouldn’t want anyone to get lazy.

Posted: October 16th, 2009 | No Comments »

Sounds like @Brixsmithstart took a long lunch.

I ate two BIG balls of Mozzarella and I feel like I sucked down a scrotum! Someone pass the stomach pump!

Posted: October 13th, 2009 | 2 Comments »

The seventh is the Silly Songs Anniversary? @StephStricklen is using that as a euphemism… right?

today the husband and i celebrate 7 years of marriage and more than 14 years together. we plan to change diapers, sing silly songs, and rest

Posted: October 12th, 2009 | No Comments »
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