Really, really more than you want to know.

I know a guy who would be happy to take over for you

If I look at one more piece of lingerie today, I may vomit.

Posted: April 8th, 2009 | No Comments »

Someone is going to be sore.

I have appointments with the gynecologist and the dentist. Today's theme? "Open Wide."

Posted: April 7th, 2009 | 3 Comments »

Which part of her was moving?

OMG they just wheeled a woman on a stretcher off the plane. She does not look good but is moving

Posted: April 6th, 2009 | No Comments »

What did you do to it?

My uvula hurts like a mother fucker.

Oversharers sure seem to like to talk about their uvulas.

Posted: April 3rd, 2009 | No Comments »

You were right, Melanie. Sounds like it is time.

Counting down the minutes until my hair appointment. I'm starting to resemble a man's armpit, so I figured it was time.

Posted: April 2nd, 2009 | No Comments »

I do not want to know how that happened.

Loni has poison oak all over her eyes.

Posted: April 1st, 2009 | No Comments »

Yep. It sure does.

Does it make me anal to want to sit in the same exact seat on every flight?

Posted: March 31st, 2009 | No Comments »

That depends on what kind of job you want.

HOW MUCH COCK are you REALLY EXPECTED to suck on a resume's cover letter?! Advice?

Posted: March 30th, 2009 | No Comments »

Say, Brent… What is the meaning of leaderhip?

Leadership is holding a cold rag on the head of a hospitalized stranger with one hand while holding a pan to catch their vomit in the other.

Put that on a promotional poster.

Posted: March 27th, 2009 | 2 Comments »

No, I think you need that one.

I feel like I might vomit up my spleen. That's one of those ones you don't need, right?

Posted: March 26th, 2009 | 4 Comments »
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