Really, really more than you want to know.

Don’t ever give up, @ThatKevinSmith

As a big fan of thorough ass-wiping, I'm thinking of getting: But is it a "fat guy" appliance? Is this giving up?

While we have your attention, Kevin… er Mr. Smith. Can we call you Kevin? Um, can we just say that we are big big fans? Of your movies, that is. Not of thorough ass-wiping. Well, you know, of course everyone is a fan of a thorough ass-wiping. Well, not a fan fan, but um, you know. Wow. Why do we always do this when celebrities overshare?

Posted: June 26th, 2009 | No Comments »

A tip for @SaraBareilles: It might be less stressful if you stopped twittering for a second and used both hands.

To hell with non-perforated toilet paper. So stressful. Argh.

Posted: June 22nd, 2009 | No Comments »

More good news, @johncmayer!

Congratulations, Mr. Mayer. This was by far the most-submitted overshare ever. You have a lot of fans tracking your masturbating on Twitter. Keep it up!

Good news! I just saved 15% on my life's savings by masturbating.

Posted: June 13th, 2009 | No Comments »

Sounds like @diablocody likes them tight and wet.

I just had to use lube to put on a pair of shoes. Seriously. I refuse to accept that anything is too small for my long, simian toes.

You knew we were talking about her shoes, right?

Posted: May 20th, 2009 | No Comments »

Even celebrities sometimes overshare.

demi moore is getting hair ripped out

Posted: March 2nd, 2009 | No Comments »
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